Diabetes and a three year old

Children are amazing creatures.  They pick up on things that you don't think they can even understand.  My insulin pump was beeping at me last night because the canula was low.  Rhea says to me "Oh no Mommy, your diabetes is low, you better get a juice.  Don't worry I'll get it for you"  I can count on my hand the number of times I have said I am low to her but somehow she realized it was important and compartmentalized it in her brain.  She then went on to tell me that "Rhea doesn't have diabetes, Maggie doesn't have diabetes, Daddy doesn't have diabetes, Dukie doesn't have diabetes, only Mommy does"  Apparently she has been listening to me.  Having had diabetes since 1991 it is a huge part of who I am now.  I want to set a great example for my daughters  of what living with T1 diabetes looks like.  I want them to understand the disease but I don't want them afraid of it.  I have  often been asked "Aren't you afraid of giving it to them?"  Of course I am.  It is one of the stupidest questions anyone can ask me.  Oh course I worry about the health and safety of my children but I don't let the fear of diabetes control my life.  I am the only person in my family with diabetes of any kind.  No one has any form of diabetes at all.  Maybe I am just a fluke.  Maybe for me it is not genetic or hereditary.  Maybe it is just one of those things.  So I will let Rhea get my juice when my sugar is low.  Because there will come a day when the only juice in the house is an Elmo juice box and I am positive she will fight me tooth and nail for it.  And I will need her to understand it is medicine for Mommy and that I am not stealing her Elmo.  But just to be safe I have stocked up on glucose tabs.

Diabetes - 22 years later

Today is my anniversary.  My Diabetes anniversary.  It has been 22 years since that fateful day in May.  I can remember how scared my mother was but was trying to not make me panic.  She kept leaving the room to get in touch with my Dad and make arrangements with my doctor.  Luckily for me and by some random act of god my best friend Stephanie was at my doctors office with her mom that day.  I remember how scared I was with the diagnosis.  Diabetes.  I mean it has the word "die" in it.  I even recall Steph and I having that conversation in the office.  "What's going to happen to you?' she asked.  "you will be fine"  she said.  Everyone kept telling me I would be fine but I knew they were scared.  And it took a long time, but I can honestly say that I am fine.  Diabetes is part of who I am at this point.  I am sure I tested my blood sugar atleast 8 times today, but I could not tell you when or that it even hurt.  My pump plays lovely music when it wants to tell me something but other than that I barely even know I am wearing it.  I think the news and sometimes my fellow diabetics make Type 1 diabetes out to be this awful thing.  My response to that negativity is that it could be worse.  The world is a cruel place.   To me Diabetes means taking care of yourself, taking care of your body, watching what you eat.  And if you think about it, shouldn't everyone be doing this in the first place?    I mean I am healthy, I am happy.  I am alive.  I am married.  I have a daughter.  Diabetes is with me everyday but I am ok with it.  So this year instead of feeling sorry for myself or anyone else with Type 1 diabetes, I am celebrating.  And yes, I can eat cake.